Is This Cheating ....

Reading through a few other blogs and piecing together a few other conversations I've started thinking about this term "emotional cheating."

It's why I haven't posted in a few days. I want to figure it out, and I think I may have a clue now. What's different about emotional cheating from good ol' filandering? It's not about the physical. It's about your heart, and giving/sharing your feelings with someone who is not your mate/girlfriend/boyfriend.

I just really wonder if there's no physicality to it, if it's really cheating. I mean, if you're not doing anything but talking with someone other than your spouse/mate about your relationship and what you feel, is that really cheating? I don't think so.

No doubt, I'll be the first one to say that you and your mate must be best friends, and should be able to talk freely about all things and do all things in front of each other without embarassment from talking about periods to making use of lavatory systems in front of each other.

But I'm not so sure that when you talk with someone else about your relationship problems and seek happiness there that it should be considered going outside the relationship.

I have a plethora of platonic female friends. I talk to some of them often about most everything that's going on with me. I enjoy their company. So does that mean that I'd have to give up the depth of those friendships when I'm in a relationship just because there's some sect of my happiness that is derived from those people, and they're there to comfort me in moments of relationship despair? I think not.

If you're really grown you shouldn't have to get rid of platonic friends of the opposite sex for your relationship. You should be able to, again if you're adult enough, to not cross the physical boundaries.

And if you cross those lines, then you shouldn't be in your relationship. Point blank. But you're going to have friendships/relationships with other people - male and female. Should they be overly emotional where you're eluding or conspiring to physically cheat? No. If that's the case, you might as well cheat and be done with the relationship.

Ha finuto. that's one of the few things I can say in Italian. It's I have finished.