A Struggle From Within ...

Before you read this one. Just know that it is solely about me, and my walk ... enjoy ...

Updated - 11:47 PM, Sunday ...
Since not to many people want to believe this is about solely me, I'll drop the verse, 1 Corinthians, Chapter 13, Verses 12 and 13: For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall understand fully, even as I have been fully understood. 13 So faith, hope, love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

The words that follow are about finding myself in a reflection of my own that is crystal clear.

A Struggle From Within
by DAMON SMITH

Lost within the maze that is my heart, I have no sense of direction.
My eyes wander for light, but their search isn’t quenched.
My hands yearn for your touch, but your security is nowhere to be sniffed out.
You made me who I am, but without you I know not what I’ve become.

Where did you go?

Just minutes ago, you consumed my every fiber
My insatiable desire seemingly you satiated
When I couldn’t breathe, you re-oxygenated my legs
When I couldn’t feel, you softened my hardened heart.
You taught me how to cherish without having to lay hands or words
You set the example, told me I'd find myself in my own reflection, the day I decided to be a man.

There you are …
Your joy fills my being the way His cup overflowed.
The abundance of my soul speaks through your eyes, and whittles out those who have no purpose in our light.
The darkness dissipates, and the kaleidoscope becomes less perplexing
We’ve cast the overcast out of the forecast, per our decision
The indecisive, contrite, weltering mass of confusion is no more
I taste my faults and hear my mistakes knowing a part of me they are
But who I am, they cannot besiege nor precede what I will become.

Where did you go?

I woke this morning, and to my dismay you weren’t there like you used to be
I solemnly fought the battle before the man you used to see.
Trying to fulfill the destiny we laid out.
But the best plan was again forsaken for an internal yearning for something less
I thought I had given my best
But I was again lost within my own forest,
Still, you maintained to be my Sequoia.
Rooted in a mustard seed that proves time and again to be more,
I know that when all is right, I’ll be back with you, at my longing's core

There you are ...
Painted with more elegance than Da Vinci could have imagined
Your face so sure, your words so pure
your touch couldn't possibly be mistaken
How did I ever find the strength, I mean weakness to walk away from what you allowed me to encompass?
Really, only a fool could understand how I ever lost you.
But somehow I did, so I guess the fool was I.
I believe, for your sake and mine,
I'll give my all, and try my best not to lose sight of myself again.